I had an interesting, yet brief, conversation with a good friend of mine yesterday. And in this conversation he urged me to not be afraid to blog whatever is on my heart.
No matter what it might say.
No matter who reads it.
And I laughed. :)
But you know what Aaron (see?!? I'm already breaking the rules, I'm naming names!)? I'm going to do it. But just to spite you - because I'm a spiteful little cuss - I'm going to do it in a way you did not expect. :)
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Music is something that is really, really, really, really close to my heart. It's something that I'm good at, and it's something that I can use to my advantage in getting my feelings, beliefs, and my ideals across to other people.
Music is one way in which I strongly and overwhelmingly feel the Spirit. Words don't speak to me quite the same when they're dry; I need a melody to cleanse my palet for their deeper meaning.
This is why I often cry when I listen to songs, or even when I'm singing (or even think abotu singing. It's not even that I'm a sap! :) It's a completely involuntary and repulsive reflex!). And the thing is... it doesn't have to be church music. The song doesn't have to be about Jesus to get to me, and this one right here is a perfect example.
So this post is a post in which I take you into the innermacinations of my mind - which may or may not be an inigma (cyber five if you got that reference!) - and we disect a song together!
First you will listen to the song and appreciate the musical genius and creativity of the artist. We won't listen to the words at all. Just tune out the presence of any English language and focus only on the music.
And then and ONLY then will we start to get into the words and what they mean to me.
Now something I say or feel may have a completely different meaning or feeling to you and that is completely okay! Embrace it! Let's appreciate our differences and rejoice in the fact that God graced us with different perspectives! :)
So I encourage you to stick with me on this ride as we identify with *drumroll*...
Mumford and Sons
"I Will Wait"
Melody Line: Candid
Harmony Lines: Sincerity
Guitar: Soul - Emotion
Banjo: Freedom
Piano: Humility
Bass: Strength - Comfort
Well I came home
Like a stone
And I fell heavy into your arms
I honestly interpret this as "coming home after a bad day". It doesn't matter what it is I'm heavy with, whether it be dissapointment, frustration, or just plain sin (because we all be sinnas yo!), but I'm returning home with it. Notice, though, that it specifically says I'm coming HOME like a stone. So I've heavy as a freaking stone (like it says) with all of my saddness, frustsration, etc., and where do I go? Not the bar, not a club, not somewhere where I can just drown my troubles away in non-sustaining worldly pleasures; I go HOME. Because home is where your comfort is. Home is where your love is. And home is where whomever's arms you are falling into is. Now this could be referring to a significant other, but I like to think of it more as Christ. I like to picture myself relying on Christ (especially with this imagery) rather than a boy. But I'm sure if I had a husband he'd be increadible and I would not mind at ALL falling heavy into his arms. :) BUT that's beside the point. The point is that I'm heavy, so I come HOME, and I come home to the arms of my Savior. I fall heavy, and He catches me.
I honestly interpret this as "coming home after a bad day". It doesn't matter what it is I'm heavy with, whether it be dissapointment, frustration, or just plain sin (because we all be sinnas yo!), but I'm returning home with it. Notice, though, that it specifically says I'm coming HOME like a stone. So I've heavy as a freaking stone (like it says) with all of my saddness, frustsration, etc., and where do I go? Not the bar, not a club, not somewhere where I can just drown my troubles away in non-sustaining worldly pleasures; I go HOME. Because home is where your comfort is. Home is where your love is. And home is where whomever's arms you are falling into is. Now this could be referring to a significant other, but I like to think of it more as Christ. I like to picture myself relying on Christ (especially with this imagery) rather than a boy. But I'm sure if I had a husband he'd be increadible and I would not mind at ALL falling heavy into his arms. :) BUT that's beside the point. The point is that I'm heavy, so I come HOME, and I come home to the arms of my Savior. I fall heavy, and He catches me.
These days of dust
Which we have known
Will blow away with this new sun
These days of dust. Think of (since we all live in Arizona) a haboob. Think of for how those thirty minutes all you can hear is angry wind, all you can see out your windows is brown, and all you can smell and taste is the dirt that's getting in through the cracks in your doors and windows (and I'm sure through your A/C Unit as well...). Now think of that for lasting a little bit more than 30 minutes... say it lasted an hour. Or two, or three, or one hundred and sixty eight! Say it lasted for one whole week! Well you have a job to keep, a family to support, you still have to go to work, no matter the weather! So you have to walk our to your car with your eyes half shut to your car and drive in the storm. And it's making your teeth gritty, and your eyes are burning and the wind is trying to push your car into the next lane... how chaotic! "Which we have known"... now imagine this being a regular occurance. Just ponder that for a minute. It's been going on for so long that you don't just get it... but you KNOW it. And now that you've come home like a stone and fallen heavy into the arms of Jesus Christ, what does He tell you? "Be of good cheer. These days of dust will blow away with this new sun". First of all, the relief behind the statement "blow away" blows ME away! It means I don't have to put any effort into pushing or scraping away my adversity, it'll just go with one blow (and not an explosion type of blow... I know what you're thinking :)). And the sun. I know how we desert rats hate the sight of that thing, but the rising sun represents a fresh start, a new slate, and hope on the horizon. Both a reward for our endurance and a promise that it does get better.
These days of dust. Think of (since we all live in Arizona) a haboob. Think of for how those thirty minutes all you can hear is angry wind, all you can see out your windows is brown, and all you can smell and taste is the dirt that's getting in through the cracks in your doors and windows (and I'm sure through your A/C Unit as well...). Now think of that for lasting a little bit more than 30 minutes... say it lasted an hour. Or two, or three, or one hundred and sixty eight! Say it lasted for one whole week! Well you have a job to keep, a family to support, you still have to go to work, no matter the weather! So you have to walk our to your car with your eyes half shut to your car and drive in the storm. And it's making your teeth gritty, and your eyes are burning and the wind is trying to push your car into the next lane... how chaotic! "Which we have known"... now imagine this being a regular occurance. Just ponder that for a minute. It's been going on for so long that you don't just get it... but you KNOW it. And now that you've come home like a stone and fallen heavy into the arms of Jesus Christ, what does He tell you? "Be of good cheer. These days of dust will blow away with this new sun". First of all, the relief behind the statement "blow away" blows ME away! It means I don't have to put any effort into pushing or scraping away my adversity, it'll just go with one blow (and not an explosion type of blow... I know what you're thinking :)). And the sun. I know how we desert rats hate the sight of that thing, but the rising sun represents a fresh start, a new slate, and hope on the horizon. Both a reward for our endurance and a promise that it does get better.
But I'll kneel down
Wait for now
And I'll kneel down
Know my ground
But I'll kneel down... the "but" in that statement is what I love because it signifies what we do on our part. Christ takes away all of our heavyness, and he blows away the dust, and what do we do on our part? Kneel down, wait for now. Patience. Be calm (not to quote Fun. or anything {#hipster}). And have a little faith. I know my ground, where I stand, and where I've been. He knows where I'll go. I know the ground I've walked on, He knows the ground I'll dance on. My knowledge of "my ground" is limited, His is not. But I'll kneel down, and I'll wait for now. I'll be patient, and calm, and trusting. Because I know my ground, I'll kneel down. I'll have faith that the ground he helped me over in the past with carry on into the future. Because He'll continue to blow away the dust, and catch me when I fall heavy into His arms, I'll kneel down.
But I'll kneel down... the "but" in that statement is what I love because it signifies what we do on our part. Christ takes away all of our heavyness, and he blows away the dust, and what do we do on our part? Kneel down, wait for now. Patience. Be calm (not to quote Fun. or anything {#hipster}). And have a little faith. I know my ground, where I stand, and where I've been. He knows where I'll go. I know the ground I've walked on, He knows the ground I'll dance on. My knowledge of "my ground" is limited, His is not. But I'll kneel down, and I'll wait for now. I'll be patient, and calm, and trusting. Because I know my ground, I'll kneel down. I'll have faith that the ground he helped me over in the past with carry on into the future. Because He'll continue to blow away the dust, and catch me when I fall heavy into His arms, I'll kneel down.
And I will wait,
I will wait for you
And I will wait,
I will wait for you
Now this one can be interpreted different ways. "You" doesn't, as I feel, completely fit in referring to God. I don't feel like I have to "wait" for His grace or forgiveness - BUT... that doesn't mean I don't have to wait for certain blessings. I have to wait for my future spouse, because God knows just how worth it it's going to be. I am being prepared and so is he, and He is going to let me ("let" not "make") wait until we are both ready for each other. It could also be a goal, for example a college degree, or for the opportunity to have a child, or anything that's difficult to wait for, even discouraging at some points, but in the end will be more worth it than we can ever imagine! But the "you" isn't even my favorite part of this chorus... it's the "will". Being willing to wait and submitting yourself to the will of the Lord, I feel, is key! Would it be the same if we were forced to wait by the hand of God rather than allowed? See the difference? :) In saying, "I WILL wait" I am agreeing, we're in this together. "I'm going to wait while you take care of things up there because I know you know better than I do".
Now this one can be interpreted different ways. "You" doesn't, as I feel, completely fit in referring to God. I don't feel like I have to "wait" for His grace or forgiveness - BUT... that doesn't mean I don't have to wait for certain blessings. I have to wait for my future spouse, because God knows just how worth it it's going to be. I am being prepared and so is he, and He is going to let me ("let" not "make") wait until we are both ready for each other. It could also be a goal, for example a college degree, or for the opportunity to have a child, or anything that's difficult to wait for, even discouraging at some points, but in the end will be more worth it than we can ever imagine! But the "you" isn't even my favorite part of this chorus... it's the "will". Being willing to wait and submitting yourself to the will of the Lord, I feel, is key! Would it be the same if we were forced to wait by the hand of God rather than allowed? See the difference? :) In saying, "I WILL wait" I am agreeing, we're in this together. "I'm going to wait while you take care of things up there because I know you know better than I do".
So break my step
And relent
Well you forgave and I won't forget
Break my step... should I stray off the path. Break my step... should I head into harms way. Break my step... should it be for my learning and experience. Give me a mountain to climb, and I'll climb it, for I trust you won't ever give me a task I can't accomplish. So break my step and relent... literally to soften temper, fear, or intesity... to become more mild and compassionate. So I feel like the statement "and relent" after the faithful request to "break my step" is an expression of a natural fear of the unknown. A slight hesitation in asking for that mountain for fear you won't be able to reach the top. So send me a trial, if it will better me, and I'll carry on... but please keep in mind my weakness and have compassion on me. And this last line may be my favorite out of the whole song! It's great if you're invisioning a siginifcant other for this because it's of accepting despite faults, and loving the other who forgave you more because they lifted you up when you were down. Also, this line comes directly after the request for "relent"... almost as if asking forgiveness for letting their faith falter but for a moment. This also kind of reminds me of the apostle Paul when he walked on the water with Christ, but allowed his earthly fears to get in the way of his faith, and what did Christ exibit? IMMEDIATE forgiveness! He stretched forth his hand in that split second to grab the hand of he who faltered and you know what? ...if that was me... I'd never forget that. Through the atonement Christ has forgiven me of my sin, and I have never forgotten it. And I never will.
Break my step... should I stray off the path. Break my step... should I head into harms way. Break my step... should it be for my learning and experience. Give me a mountain to climb, and I'll climb it, for I trust you won't ever give me a task I can't accomplish. So break my step and relent... literally to soften temper, fear, or intesity... to become more mild and compassionate. So I feel like the statement "and relent" after the faithful request to "break my step" is an expression of a natural fear of the unknown. A slight hesitation in asking for that mountain for fear you won't be able to reach the top. So send me a trial, if it will better me, and I'll carry on... but please keep in mind my weakness and have compassion on me. And this last line may be my favorite out of the whole song! It's great if you're invisioning a siginifcant other for this because it's of accepting despite faults, and loving the other who forgave you more because they lifted you up when you were down. Also, this line comes directly after the request for "relent"... almost as if asking forgiveness for letting their faith falter but for a moment. This also kind of reminds me of the apostle Paul when he walked on the water with Christ, but allowed his earthly fears to get in the way of his faith, and what did Christ exibit? IMMEDIATE forgiveness! He stretched forth his hand in that split second to grab the hand of he who faltered and you know what? ...if that was me... I'd never forget that. Through the atonement Christ has forgiven me of my sin, and I have never forgotten it. And I never will.
Know what we've seen
And Him with less
Now in some ways shake the excess
We talked about how we know our ground... on the same not we also know what we've seen. This however, is a little bit more complicated than just knowing where we've been because our minds are complicated little buggers and can scew our perception on things. Nonetheless, we do know what that perception is, no matter how biased. Those biased perceptions are what make up our memories, and our memories build up our experiences which build our character. We learn from our experiences no matter how good or bad, but the bad ones just seem to stick with us more don't they? And it's easy to get caught up in our selfish little selves and throw pity parties. Dudes. I do it all the time! But then look at that next line... and Him with less. The Son of God hath descended below them all, art thou better than He? bam. That's all I have to say on that sentence, just let it marinate for a minute. :) NOW! That's it's marinated, MOVE ON! Shake the excess! Whether it be excess hate, excess anger, excess anxiety, fear, sadness, stress, let it go! Shake it off your back! It's not going to do you any good, so why keep it there? I know it's hard, and I know you feel like you don't have enough strength, or the right tools, but in some way find out how you can shake it off. I know you can do it... because He did it with less than you have.
We talked about how we know our ground... on the same not we also know what we've seen. This however, is a little bit more complicated than just knowing where we've been because our minds are complicated little buggers and can scew our perception on things. Nonetheless, we do know what that perception is, no matter how biased. Those biased perceptions are what make up our memories, and our memories build up our experiences which build our character. We learn from our experiences no matter how good or bad, but the bad ones just seem to stick with us more don't they? And it's easy to get caught up in our selfish little selves and throw pity parties. Dudes. I do it all the time! But then look at that next line... and Him with less. The Son of God hath descended below them all, art thou better than He? bam. That's all I have to say on that sentence, just let it marinate for a minute. :) NOW! That's it's marinated, MOVE ON! Shake the excess! Whether it be excess hate, excess anger, excess anxiety, fear, sadness, stress, let it go! Shake it off your back! It's not going to do you any good, so why keep it there? I know it's hard, and I know you feel like you don't have enough strength, or the right tools, but in some way find out how you can shake it off. I know you can do it... because He did it with less than you have.
I will wait, I will wait for you.
And I will wait,
I will wait for you
And I will wait,
I will wait for you
And I will wait,
I will wait for you
We talked about this one. :) I just want t opoint out that he takes the octave higher and it makes it sound so much more passionate!!! LOVE IT!
We talked about this one. :) I just want t opoint out that he takes the octave higher and it makes it sound so much more passionate!!! LOVE IT!
Now I'll be bold
As well as strong
And use my head alongside my heart
Hmmm, am I the only one who is reminded of this post when reading the first sentence? :) Ha ha, so think of everything we've just talked about. Coming home and falling into the arms of Christ, feeling safe in the shelter of His hold and hearing Him tell you that your adversity will soon blow away if you'll just stay faithful and be willing to wait. You agree, you even tell Him that should it be His will the storm can continue for as long as it needs to, and you the nrejoice in the atonement and His forgiveness of your mistakes and your sins. Reflecting upon your past mistakes and sins it can be hard to let everything go. We all go through crap, and those can callace us. Take away a part of ourselves. But in remembering Christ's life on the earth and His resistance to those callaces with even greater struggles than we face it becomes just a little bit easier to shake those off, to be faithful, and to be willing to wait. :) Now, after shaking off all the excess we identified and having our hearts filled with the grace of the atonement, wouldn't you feel empowered? Wouldn't you want other people to know that their storms can blow away too, and that if they need to fall they can because He'll catch them? I know I would! And I wouldn't just be like, "So... um... God is good 'n' stuff..." Heck no! I'd be bold! I wouldn't be preachy, but I'd be candid with them, and I'd let them know just how much He loves them and wants them to know that! And you know what? Some people wil reject that message because we were given agency. It's a part of life. But I'm not going to let that make me give up, not I'm going to be strong! And I'm going to use my head alongside my heart. I'm going to feel it, as well as ponder it.
Hmmm, am I the only one who is reminded of this post when reading the first sentence? :) Ha ha, so think of everything we've just talked about. Coming home and falling into the arms of Christ, feeling safe in the shelter of His hold and hearing Him tell you that your adversity will soon blow away if you'll just stay faithful and be willing to wait. You agree, you even tell Him that should it be His will the storm can continue for as long as it needs to, and you the nrejoice in the atonement and His forgiveness of your mistakes and your sins. Reflecting upon your past mistakes and sins it can be hard to let everything go. We all go through crap, and those can callace us. Take away a part of ourselves. But in remembering Christ's life on the earth and His resistance to those callaces with even greater struggles than we face it becomes just a little bit easier to shake those off, to be faithful, and to be willing to wait. :) Now, after shaking off all the excess we identified and having our hearts filled with the grace of the atonement, wouldn't you feel empowered? Wouldn't you want other people to know that their storms can blow away too, and that if they need to fall they can because He'll catch them? I know I would! And I wouldn't just be like, "So... um... God is good 'n' stuff..." Heck no! I'd be bold! I wouldn't be preachy, but I'd be candid with them, and I'd let them know just how much He loves them and wants them to know that! And you know what? Some people wil reject that message because we were given agency. It's a part of life. But I'm not going to let that make me give up, not I'm going to be strong! And I'm going to use my head alongside my heart. I'm going to feel it, as well as ponder it.
So tame my flesh
And fix my eyes
A tethered mind freed from the lies
So tame my flesh... the natural man. And fix my eyes... which are covered by the veil. A tethered mind... tethered to the bonds of the world, tethered by time, and by sin. Freed from the lies... the lies spoken by Satan, that we aren't good enough, that God doesn't love us, and that we are his. :) All I have to say on this one... just let that imagery marinate for a bit as well. :)
So tame my flesh... the natural man. And fix my eyes... which are covered by the veil. A tethered mind... tethered to the bonds of the world, tethered by time, and by sin. Freed from the lies... the lies spoken by Satan, that we aren't good enough, that God doesn't love us, and that we are his. :) All I have to say on this one... just let that imagery marinate for a bit as well. :)
And I'll kneel down
Wait for now
I'll kneel down
Know my ground
We talked about this one, just remember how great it was! :)
We talked about this one, just remember how great it was! :)
Raise my hands
Paint my spirit gold
Bow my head
Keep my heart slow
Raise my hands in praise, is what I see with this. You know those big black women singin' in the gospel choirs with their hands in the air? :) That's what I see... maybe with just a little less dancin'. :) And I love this imagery too: paint my spirit gold. Gold is considered to be a pure metal, and of extreme value. God sees our Spirits as gold, and we ask him to show us the light radiating from our "gold" spirits so that the light of Christ can shine not just within us, but through us! Bow my head... in prayer. :) And I love this: keep my heart slow. I know that I tend to let my soul get a little bit restless. Sometimes I just can't wait for the next step in my life. I can't wait to start college, I can't wait to have a job, I can't wait to be able to live on my own, I can't wait to have a significant other, yada yada yada. But what I'm missing out on in the meantime is so much more important! I have my whole life to work, but I only have this precious time to enjoy myself and to hae the freedom to fun things whenever! And while I'm dreaming of having the freedom of my own place I am taking advantage of having my family right here with me, and missing out on time spent with them! And psh! A significat other would be fun and nice, yes, but in the meantime why not take advantage of the fun fact that you're SINGLE?! :D You have the freedom to discover, and to meet new people, so go do it! Plus you have the opportunity to discover yourself and who you are without the co-dependence of another person relying on you. So I ask God to help me to keep my heart slow, to help my head from running away without me. Bow my head and keep my heart slow, so that I might savor the present before it becomes my past.
'Cus I will wait,
Raise my hands in praise, is what I see with this. You know those big black women singin' in the gospel choirs with their hands in the air? :) That's what I see... maybe with just a little less dancin'. :) And I love this imagery too: paint my spirit gold. Gold is considered to be a pure metal, and of extreme value. God sees our Spirits as gold, and we ask him to show us the light radiating from our "gold" spirits so that the light of Christ can shine not just within us, but through us! Bow my head... in prayer. :) And I love this: keep my heart slow. I know that I tend to let my soul get a little bit restless. Sometimes I just can't wait for the next step in my life. I can't wait to start college, I can't wait to have a job, I can't wait to be able to live on my own, I can't wait to have a significant other, yada yada yada. But what I'm missing out on in the meantime is so much more important! I have my whole life to work, but I only have this precious time to enjoy myself and to hae the freedom to fun things whenever! And while I'm dreaming of having the freedom of my own place I am taking advantage of having my family right here with me, and missing out on time spent with them! And psh! A significat other would be fun and nice, yes, but in the meantime why not take advantage of the fun fact that you're SINGLE?! :D You have the freedom to discover, and to meet new people, so go do it! Plus you have the opportunity to discover yourself and who you are without the co-dependence of another person relying on you. So I ask God to help me to keep my heart slow, to help my head from running away without me. Bow my head and keep my heart slow, so that I might savor the present before it becomes my past.
'Cus I will wait,
I will wait for you
And I will wait,
I will wait for you
And I will wait,
I will wait for you
And I will wait, I will wait for you
And we've already done the fantastic chorus, so sit back, listen, and contemplate what we derived from it. :) It's awesome!
Now if you REALLY want to blow your own mind, take a look at the color coordinated break down I did of what the instrument sounds and parts mean to me. Either the feeling the create inside me because of their specific sound, or what their part literally sounds like it signifies, take note. Listen to the song, look at the music "feelings", and rememeber the analysis we disected out of the verses. While you're reading the words of the verses think of which instruments and voice parts (either the meldy or the harmonies) are most prominent... then put two and two together.
Your mind will be blown. :)
------------------------------------------------------
And there you are! A very long winded post where I put my heart on my sleeve and share the analitical process in which I interpret and listen to music.
*Jedi mind trick finger wave* You will no longer question my love of music.
You will no longer judge when a song makes me cry.
You will realize these are not the droids you are look for.
You will close this window, get off the computer, and go do something worthwhile with the rest of your day.
You will come back again and keep reading this blog.
Because it rocks.
*Jedi mind trick complete*
And we've already done the fantastic chorus, so sit back, listen, and contemplate what we derived from it. :) It's awesome!
Now if you REALLY want to blow your own mind, take a look at the color coordinated break down I did of what the instrument sounds and parts mean to me. Either the feeling the create inside me because of their specific sound, or what their part literally sounds like it signifies, take note. Listen to the song, look at the music "feelings", and rememeber the analysis we disected out of the verses. While you're reading the words of the verses think of which instruments and voice parts (either the meldy or the harmonies) are most prominent... then put two and two together.
Your mind will be blown. :)
------------------------------------------------------
And there you are! A very long winded post where I put my heart on my sleeve and share the analitical process in which I interpret and listen to music.
*Jedi mind trick finger wave* You will no longer question my love of music.
You will no longer judge when a song makes me cry.
You will realize these are not the droids you are look for.
You will close this window, get off the computer, and go do something worthwhile with the rest of your day.
You will come back again and keep reading this blog.
Because it rocks.
*Jedi mind trick complete*
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