Happy {Love} Day

After long, looong day today I drove home.

I had been a student, been a caregiver, been a daughter, been a sister, and a musician today, but one thing I sure didn't feel like was a Valentine.

As I drove home in the dark, the February air cool and refreshing blowing through the window, I pondered what exactly this holiday meant and what I have ever done to celebrate it in my life.

The answer was short and clear: I haven't.

I've never gone out of my way to do something for anybody on Valentines day, I simply never felt the need.

I felt a mixture of guilt and shame towards myself as I pulled my mind out of self-pity and realized that there were so many wonderful things I could have done for other people today, people that I care about. Friends, family, church leaders, teachers, all of them I could have reached out to and thanked them for being a part of my life.

I got home and brought in the cute card my dad had left in my car, gently placing it on my bed beside the gift my mom had given me.

I looked at their simple gifts, given with pure love and thought, glanced over at the box of Jeffrey's letters (which had been haunting me the entire day), and then back at theirs. I resolved to sort through Jeffrey's letters the next day.

They were a part of a very big chapter in my life, but that chapter is over.

It's time to move on and realize how very blessed I am to be in the family that I am in. A family that will let me still live at home during college, a family who will laugh with me, a family who will go out of their way to make me feel special on Valentines day.

Is it hard being single? Yes, and no. Yes, it's hard watching all of the people around you get showered with flowers and love notes and hugs and kisses whilst you twiddle your thumbs and sing, "Jesus Loves Everyone" to yourself.

But no, no it isn't hard being just me. Being "alone" is an extremely relative term, and is one that absolutely does not apply to me! I have my family around me, I have some of the best friends in the world who have my back, and I have the Lord Jesus Christ and my Heavenly Father. All of them I have on my team... so tell me again, I'm alone because I'm single?

Nah, I'm just on reserve until Prince Charming comes along. ;)

So when this girl got home and realized that she hadn't reached out to anybody on their Valentines day she decided she could still treat HERSELF.

Peppermint tea and Junior Mints?

I think so. :)

Happy Valentines Day!