And They Shall Eat Their Meals Blended

So today I was feelin' pretty darn good about myself.

I had gone to hell the bank and finally set up a in number for my card... you know, so I can actually use it.

I had also called Desert Ridge High School and got my transcript sent over to CGCC so that I will be able to go to school for free.

Because free is good.

And on top of that I had gone grocery shopping with my mom, boughten (t'is so a word) a ton of produce, and even got my car washed!

Because Norma Gene was a filthy filthy vehicle.

Needless to say I was feeling like super woman. When I looked in the mirror I swear I was glowing with new-found super powers!

It was at this moment that my cartoon inner voice (like on Lizzie McGuire!) cartwheeled out and anounced that we should make some lunch, but not just any lunch... this lunch!

It looked delicious, sounded easy enough to make, and I was pretty sure I had all of the ingredients.

So the veggie wrap making process began.

Obsticle #1: Ingredients

But this would not deter me, after all, I had super powers now! If I was missing some sour cream, I'd just substitute some mayonaise... even though I hate mayonaise... and if I was missing some radishes, I'd just cute up some carrots instead... same difference right? I also substituted tuna for roast beef, and left out the basil.

*This is, in fact a true story, I cannot make up this level of stupidity!*

Obsticle #2: Presentation

Now, the instruction to "roll up" this tortilla wrap sounded easy enough. I mean, I learned to roll things up when I was in Preschool, surely a Freshman in college (with super powers, mind you) can roll up her delicious meal. Little did this human know that her fod had a mind of its own, and that tortillas are only stretcy at Chipotle because this thing TORE!

Yes it tore.

And I panicked.

A little nipping and tucking later and the thing was, sort of, rolled up. It wasn't beautiful, but hey, as long as it tasted-.........

Obsticle #3: Taste

It was vile. My genius substitutes somehow weren't so genuis (the mayonaise probably being the worst offender) and I was only able to gag down about seven bites before giving up! And friends, I am no picky eater.

So what's a girl to do in a such a situation? She's already wasted a butt-load of food, and was now begining to conclude that she would have to mary an Italian chef if her future children were to ever be fed. My belly had been assulted by a disgusting mixture of ingredients and was still expecting lunch....
...so I made a chocolate-peanut butter shake with frozen bananas and spinach instead. :)
Can't go wrong with a blender, right? :)

So next time I decide to "whip together" something to eat...

...remind me to not. :)

Also, please take notice of the lovely buttons on the right hand sidebar. They are yours for the taking, so if you like this blog, please feel free to swipe them and sprinkle them around your own lovely blogs, it'd be great to see some more traffic 'round these parts! :)

And thank you to everyone who voted on the poll while I was gone! The winner by a landslide was the "Ruthie" template (which makes me happy... that one was my favorite too :) ), so hopefully we'll get that up and running by the end of the week!

Happy Monday!