Current Thoughts

*I am thankful right now that Heavenly Father allowed my relationship with my older sister to finally become strong. We always fought when we were younger... ALWAYS! Over the stupidest things we would fight to the point of injury (I popped her jaw out funny... she broke my collar bone), so, needless to say, our relationship was always a little bit... "rocky". However, in the past couple of years I don't know exactly what has changed in the both of us, but we have been able to grow so much closer and I absolutely LOVE IT! Today I was able to laugh with her and vent to her on the phone and she listened like only a sister really could... and it was exactly what I needed. I love my sister!!

*A couple of weeks ago one of my guy friends made the remark, "So... your short hair looks great on you and everything... but when are you going to grow it back out again?" It made me seriously consider something that I hadn't really thought about doing again... ever. And I decided that no matter how many guys are turned off by it, I am GOING to KEEP my short hair for quite some time! Sorry guys. :) But I love it. And if I do decide to grow it out a little longer again it'll be on my terms, not yours.

*Community College has really made me realize just how much smarter of a person I am than I ever gave myself credit for. Turns out I DID belong in all those AP classes I took, and it turns out that I COULD have gotten into a University if I had wanted to! I feel peaceful about my decision to start out at CGCC, and I have no doubt that it is the path that I am supposed to be on at this point in my life... it just feels good to know that once I decide to head up to Rexburg (or wherever else I need to go) I'll still have the brain cut out for it. :) Community College does NOT always equal failure at life.

*Weight lifting at my local community gym has turned into a surprisingly incredible outlet for me! Who knew that crazy Intro to Weights class in High School could open the door to something so good for me? I honestly would have never considered trying lifting on my own, but since I've started it has helped me so much in relieving stress and dealing with stress. Plus, health wise, I feel so much better... overall it's just a good thing. :)

*So I had the opportunity of talking with my good friend Janice again the other day, we met for lunch at my favorite Thai restaurant, and over some chicken red curry she told me a tale of woe regarding our old friend Rudy. Yes, that Rudy is always causing trouble in her life. Now, in her defense, may I just say that she tried her very very VERY hardest to get over him? She really did! And I was very proud of her! However, this summer she had the unfortunate opportunity of becoming very close with him again... there were many dates, afternoons of hanging out, phone calls, and hours and hours of spiritual discussions in his car that made her inevitably remember everything that she originally loved about him. And she fell... hard... again. It also didn't help that he was, once again, single. Not only did it help to kindle a little bit of hope in her, but it also gave her the chance to be there for him in recovering from that heartbreak. Well... long story short Janice decided that she had nothing else to loose and that before Rudy left for college that she would be brave and tell him exactly how she felt, without reservation! Not for the purpose of getting into a relationship with him, but just to get it off her chest finally! She planned it out perfectly, rehearsed her speech, the whole nine yards... and then, as if he knew, he just stopped responding to her. These past five days he wouldn't respond to any of her texts or messages. She could NOT get a hold of him no matter how hard she tried! Well... he leaves tomorrow. And she didn't even get the chance to say goodbye or admit her true feelings to that jerk wad. He couldn't even make time for a short talk at Jamba Juice with her (which could only take what... an hour at most?). And now that she's built up these feelings to let out, they have to be clogged back inside her little chest and left there to wait until who knows when (or ever) they'll be let out again. Oh why can't she just either be at peace with the fact that at this point in her life boys aren't something she gets to experience, or have someone decent finally pop up in her life? *sigh* Janice, if you're reading this... try your best to forget Rudy. Don't forget everything you loved, and frankly still love, about him, just forget him. Find those things you love in somebody else who is going to treat you better than Rudy ever did, and let your heart move on.